pistol whippin’ ghetto cheerleaders
An anonymous user sent me this pic. Yes, this is real, as in not some photo klepto’d from College Humor or Google. Go ahead, try to find it. Up until the very moment of this post, we are the only ones that have this pic.
The anonymous note left with this pic in our HTT inbox:
Attached find a pic my friend took of a girl in a bathroom in Buckheads “The Ivy” bar and restaurant. How it could have possibly occurred, i know not. I do know that this was a still pose, and not caught in the moment of falling.
Thank you Mr. Anonymous for this pic. Now for the breakdown:
Look at this chick. GA Tech all the way. First impressions are mixed at best, I give her credit for at least getting her panties down (or at least wearing panties for that matter) and that she is actually stuck and passed out in this position.
I can just see this broad bee-boppin’ into this restroom all stublin’ and fumblin’ around, probably shoulder checking some hotter-than-she-is blonde at the door and quipping, ‘Watch out you fucking bitch!”. However, it probably sounded more like, “Wassssschiout, you fuck—-ing BITCH!” all slurred and mostly beyond recognition.
Next, this ‘Apple of Daddy’s eye’ barrels into the stall with an ill-appreciated yet exuberent way-too-loud exclamation of ‘Oh my fucking God, I gotta PEEEEEEE!”. ‘Blop’ goes the purse close to the door of the stall because in the minds of girls such as these (typical pretentious Tech types), she would rather sink her face in piss rather than risking that precious Coach leather sopping up someone else’s ammonia infused bodily fluid. What’s good for my face is not good enough for my purse….
Just about the time her evacuation is complete: slipping, slipping…sssllliiippiinngggg….SUNK over, face full of piss, eternal Dawg lovin’ damnation.
Judging by the lone bit of tissue by her purse, this Techie had to blow her nose. One would think, “hey, throw that shit into the toilet, you’re gonna flush it anyway”, but that is oh so hard to do when your entire torso is over the toilet and your lips are kissing the piss soaked floor.
Notice the toilet paper above and around the toilet paper dispenser. These were thrown around in an effort to send a ‘SOS’ of sorts. And when you lose that much control on some pucker watermelon shots, that took some effort. But that hot blonde that she checked when she got into the restroom probably took note that this girl was a train-wreck waiting to happen. And in her mind, as long as this bitch was breathing, there was no need for help. Or maybe her version of help was to take this photo and send it to me.
Typical Tech bullshit. Girls wanting to drink like UGA women! What a joke. A UGA woman would have never been in this situation because 1) she is not a dork who never drinks. She can hold her liquor and has more class than that. and 2) Always rolls deep enough that even if by some chance she winds up in this situation, her friends are getting her off of that toilet and whoopin’ any bitch’s ass who is taking pictures. Although it should be said that a UGA woman would also take this picture and send it to Inspector G, which is witty AND classy.
Have fun losing more recruits because you’re chicks look like this.
God, I didn’t even get to that awful vest she has on. Is that fucking denim?
This is the biggest game of the year and honestly, it really wasn’t 2 weeks ago. That’s why we here at HTT are pulling out all the stops and posting not only informative and insightful material, but material that will hopefully make you make fun of, guffaw at, and hate hate hate on all things gator.
First things first; for yet another year, I cannot attend the game. I have to work this weekend. Foxtrot Mike Lima.
Next, I will warn all of you ladies and/or female significant others out there to stay away from this guy:
Jeanus Shortus Douchebagus is found in and around trailer parks, central florida dive bars, and anywhere Pall Malls are sold. These idiots crazy assholes run around, all nimbly bimbly like, meth’d out and want to talk about anything UF football, which normally revolves around how good Tebow is, why screwing Tebow is not gay, and why Tebow should start every NFL game.
Also these idiots crazy assholes like UGA girls. Normally a pick up line would start like this: “Hey baby, you ever flossed with 100% pure cotton before? No? Would you like a shot of Patron with crusties in it and a cigarette? No? Aw hell, I’m just kidding.” But they are not. They are 11ty Billion% serious.
These folks are to be the on receiving end of relentless, tenacious, and voracious attacks on their personal, physical, and emotional health. No holds barred. No family member stricken with cancer on her death or a slow opaquely simpleton child should be spared. Use all you can, crush them mercilessly and when you’re done and they are crying pour salt, gasoline, Turbo AIDS, dicks, and a flame thrower in their wounds. Basically defecate in and or around their souls, their very essence.
In the spirit of this week and Hallows Eve, here is a lovely picture captured by a true Dawg fan who gets the point. This fine gentleman actually dressed up as a Gator fan for Halloween and lo and behold, he got a plethora of these: “What are you supposed to be? A Florida fan?” Ah, the irony is palpable.
Moving right along, I really like our chances in this one. I think we might have finally hit rock bottom enough to not care about the ‘Jax Jinx’ bullcrap. It’s about time we just forget about all of that mojo and quit pissing ourselves when we cross the state line. Mark my words: Attitude will be the difference in this game, not talent.
More to come later. Register for our feed so you automatically get the updates. As one loyal and valued reader told me recently, “[Inspector G], I wasted like a whole Friday at work reading your site. It was the most productive thing I’d done all week.” Now THAT’s what I’m talking about. Invite your UGA savvy and UF friends, too. Tell them about us! Invite them to visit HTT, register, and subscribe.
In all seriousness Captain and I want to thank all of you: friends, readers, subscribers, our two new Post Ready Members (who have yet to post anything, so get with it…)…I know some of you might deem this a little too ‘racy’ or ‘profanity laced’, but if you do, you obviously don’t know us very well or our friends. But again, THANK YOU!
More to come this week…wow, EPICNESS…stay tuned…
Georgia adds Charleston Southern and Georgia Southern to the 2014 and 2016 football schedules, respectively. Greg McGarity wants one FCS foe each season.
Bobby Bowden speaks at the Touchdown Club of Georgia on Tuesday and advises CMR to “stay the course”.
“I’ve been through the same thing, and if you stay in the game long enough you are going to go through it one time or the other,” Bowden said. “And of course it really tests ya, it really tests ya. But it’s the nature of the game. The game is that way — if you win they love you, if you don’t win they don’t love you. It’s as simple as that. Your loyal people will stay behind you, but the everyday fan … they want to win. That’s the way it happened down here [at Florida State]. I wasn’t winning enough games to suit these people, you know? But anyway, Mark’s a little different situation because he is younger and he’s been so successful there.”
During that same meeting, Richt warns players that “it could get worse”.
“We’re going to have to get better or it’s gonna get worse. It’s not going to stay the same. I told the players, you think it’s bad now; it could get worse.”
But no matter what, Richt said, “we’re not gonna lose our poise, we’re not gonna lose our integrity. We don’t want to take our frustrations out on anyone, except maybe Colorado. … We just have to keep working hard and keep together. We must stay together.”
Not related to Georgia football, but awesome nonetheless… Jax Jaguars WR Kassim Osgood gets pistol-whipped during a gun fight between a cheerleader and her intruding/stalking ex-boyfriend. My favorite part quoted below:
Osgood, 30, reportedly leaped out a second-floor window to get away from the armed man late Monday.
The gun-wielding intruder exchanged fire with the woman after putting a gun to her head, saying, “What did that football player say to his girlfriend, it’s a good day to die,” misquoting ex-Florida Gators player Chris Rainey’s text message to a former girlfriend after an arrest, according to a Sheriff’s Office report.