This game of the century brief breakdown is brought to you by “Davis Speed Training: Two Hours A Day, 2 Days A Week, and You Can Be a 2 Pump Chump Too!!”.
Here is the breakdown Nicholas sent me:
“So we all know that LSU and Bama are gearing up for a 1 vs 2 battle of the ages. Oh really? Well in my opinion the Wisconsin Badgers and Russel Wilson would butt-rape them harder than a 6′-4” Bear on an unsuspecting twink. Let’s be honst…these teams are a direct result of a weak schedule and NOT because of their aptitude on offense, stellar coaching, supreme baby-eating talent, defense fortitude, or beast mode capabilities. No. These teams are just ranked that way because they are in the SEC.
Now, you see man, I went to UGA. But I always bet against them. I would argue with the Inspector all the time about how shitty Richt is or how bad David Green was. The only 3 players in UGA history I ever liked were DJ Shockley, Knowshon Moreno, and Joe T III. I’m a college football realist. And that’s why I love Wisconsin.
But, back to the breakdown. If I had to guess, I would say LSU wins this game, man. They are battle hardened. The quality of opponents they have played this year is much better than Alabama. In fact let me make this easy for you in a chart breakdown:
DEF PUSH PUSH
So in other words, LSU is more battle tested and has the better overall offense. I look for LSU to get a couple of scores early and let their defense try to contain Richardson. The true battle for the game, however will be the battle between Bama’s O-Line and LSU’s D-Line. If they can’t keep the LSU bigguns off of Mccarron, it is gonna be a long night Bama fans.
Score: 24-10 LSU. Or better yet, I’ll post a picture that will graphically represent my thoughts on this game:
Long time no see, friends. I could go on about how boring this time of year is and how we were too lazy to post, but that would be information you already knew.
The most important thing that should be on your minds at this time is FOOTBALL SEASON. You can almost smell it in the air. Camp has started, all of our tailbacks are hurt, and no one has been arrested…yet. Definitely not your typical Dawg offseason. By all accounts Crowell is as good as advertised, Richard Samuel (despite the potential for being mind fu$%ed with his third position change) is actually running the ball strong, Malcome Mitchell is the next big thing in the receiving corps, Raw Drew likes cowboy hats and wreaking havoc in the backfield, Ben Jones is still eating grass with a little sprinkle of babies on it, Richt is not on the hotseat yet, and Big John Jenkins actually may be our 2nd best nose tackle.
Now while all of these things are good to hear, remember we’ve heard this talk of ‘change’ and ‘difference’ before. So I’m staying skeptical until someone socks some Boise St running back in the mouth and he fumbles. I’m staying skeptical until we run all over South Carolina so badly, it makes Stephen Garcia perform hari-kari in Spurrier’s Church’s foyer for dishonoring his family. I’m staying skeptical until we bludgen Miss St enough to make Chris Relf ralph all over Dan Mullen’s play book. I’m staying skeptical until I audibly hear Mark Richt tell our Defense, ‘Good fu*&ing stop, men! Good fu&%ing stop!”. I’m staying skeptical until I see Crowell break-down Muschamp’s Defense and Murray win his first of 2 more Cockatil Parties. I’m staying skeptical until I can actually stop looking out of my red and black colored glasses to see a team and staff that I trust to prepare, execute, and win every game we play.
As for this site, we will begin posting more frequently, but with increased vigor and vulgarity. So put the kids to bed, make sure your not looking at this at work, and get ready to shotgun some beers. Football season is a mere 2 weeks away. I can’t wait.